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Hold On

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1.
Control 02:48
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We will cheat you out of everything that you want We will sell you who you are There are no choices we already made That we feel will suit you well Oh this is us selling you out No one dares buy in Don’t stop, this is your life There’s no heart and no soul Stop selling to yourself that you want control And we’re fine Inhale and depend on lies Yeah we look our best sleeping Close your eyes Don’t breathe too deep Can you feel it? We’re watching your every move Don’t stop, this is your life There’s no heart and no soul Stop selling to yourself that you want control There is an order in which you’ll grow, in which you learn who’s bossing who There is an order in which you’ll move, in which you’ll learn who’s who Close your eyes Can you feel it?
2.
Hold On For Your Dearest Life 03:10
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You break me in two Turn me into You looking back regretting every move And I’m wearing thin But they’re not wearing out Time takes its toll and the distance is greater Loss of control We lost it Take what you want from me And I think I can’t feel anymore Take what you want from me And I can’t I can’t think anymore Held down tight and so tired Hold on for your dearest life I do as you say not as you’ve done Hold on for your dearest life I do as you say not as you’ve done Hold on/ hold on Loss of control We lost it Take what you want from me And I think I can’t feel anymore Take what you want from me And I can’t I can’t think anymore Dare I slow down and turn to paper Folding end over end…. Overflow
3.
A Year Spent Cold 03:45
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So cool and sweet Soft to the last curve of your lips Oh does this feel the same? No this can’t be Cause this feels cheap Once young but now old My heart was better sold A heart better sold… So how did I hold you this long Maybe you were still running and I couldn’t see it I was too in love too notice What a fool I am and still becoming Well are you laughing…? So now what have we? Is this it? Is this it? Cheers to farewell and a year spent cold So far I’m obvious Is this it? Is this it? Praise to goodbyes and to parting souls So cool and sweet Soft to the last curve of your lips Did you stop listening? This gash has grown deep I’m in between insanity and hope’s edge ….yeah So now what have we? Is this it? Is this it? Cheers to farewell and a year spent cold So far I’m obvious Is this it? Is this it? Praise to goodbyes and to parting souls Well I wear this well, I’m aware Applaud as you like Beat your wrists twice A small pain rose to a swell I can’t bear Applaud as you like Beat your wrists twice I’m tired of watching your lips move past me Is this for keeps? I’m tired of watching your lips move without me
4.
Panic 02:58
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So now you hear what took you years to listen for But still can’t make out the words It’s a message that makes you miserable…still Burning alive from the inside Burning down Sleep now you’re falling out of phase Panic at the disco Sat back and took it so slow Are you nervous Are you shaking Save your complements to praise the complacent We don’t have to feel we fit in We keep moving We can leave them Burning alive from the inside Burning down Sleep now you’re falling… Manufactured dreams and fabricated resolution How can we move ahead in this backward motion? So now you hear what took you years to listen for But still can’t feel it Burning alive from the inside Burning down Sleep now you’re falling… Manufactured dreams and fabricated resolution How can we move ahead in this backwards motion?
5.
This Was Never 03:20
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I’m not with you When you say, “It won’t mean a thing, love.” I still can’t move Once you’ve let me in and still closer This was never supposed to happen No one’s meant to know about us This was never supposed to happen No one’s meant to know Meant to know Stay when there’s nothing between us Oh pray for what’s left of to save Let’s not go back Let’s do our best to blend in and forget I still can’t move I miss the feeling and everything but you This was never supposed to happen No one’s meant to know about us This was never supposed to happen No one’s meant to know Meant to know It’s never this cold… Where my beating strength once came from It will never be strong or beat again Or beat again It’s never this cold…
6.
Cover Up 03:25
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Do you remember when you and I were less than us and we? Covered up what little is left of me and became one in the same The colors fading into nothing The lines are blurring and escaping I can’t breathe alone You know, you know The better part of me is stolen… Whenever you go We fell fast We proved our fates wrong at last With nothing left to show We get up slow The less we learn the more we know/ It proves how long it lasts The colors fading into nothing The lines are blurring and escaping I can’t breathe alone You know, you know The better part of me is stolen… Whenever you go Closer than before Further than I’ve ever been from anyone Cover up wrap your wrists in gauze, fill your heart with cause, if its real or not, no The colors fading into nothing The lines are blurring and escaping I can’t breathe alone You know, you know The better part of me is stolen… Whenever you go
7.
It Sounds Prettier In Spanish 02:14
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And they say once you’ve gone this way you can’t come home again Unless you shed your skin The words I meant to leave left out Reaching deeper The words I meant to leave left out Darker, darker Don’t worry I can’t kill the memory I wish I could Painted black Bleeding white I cannot come clean, come clean Put me away, I’ll spend my life And I won’t waste your time The words I meant to leave left out Oh c’mon The way it felt to just get out Oh, release me Don’t worry I can’t kill the memory I wish I could Painted black Bleeding white I cannot come clean, come clean Breakdown, fade away A life worth living can’t be saved
8.
We Give Up Sometimes 03:00
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Did you dig me up this morning, from underground, just where you left me?And your eyes meet me without recognition Know that all the idle skies have become to me who you used to be Hold your breath You know how long Do what you can to forget you were wrong Is it ok if I don’t care anymore? We give up sometimes And I guess that should be good enough for me I hope you see more of yourself then you were ready for All the things that you are now and how good things were before And now you left us Pushed us so far behind Hold your breath You know how long Do what you can to forget you were wrong Is it ok if I don’t care anymore? We give up sometimes And I guess that should be good enough for me Why are you giving up? Why won’t you stand your ground Hold your breath You know how long Do what you can to forget you were wrong Is it ok if I don’t care anymore? We give up sometimes And I guess that should be good enough for me
9.
I Quit My Scene 03:17
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It’s what you want and who you are that has always been two very different things So I wore my best clothes on the last day That I had to carry us in an uphill war And I dropped you under the shelter of an “old friend” You didn’t mind then so don’t now Is this what we’re fighting for? So why don’t you tell me how it was too little too late As far as I can see it was the best we could do This is what I fought for This is not… So why don’t you tell me the truth And so she screams to her best but I… I used to be someone better back then She used to be someone better back then So why don’t you tell me how it was too little too late As far as I could see it was the best we could do This is what I fought for This is not… So why don’t you tell me the truth Distract your captors Push them back into line What keeps you safe doesn’t keep you alive So why don’t you tell me how it was too little too late As far as I can see it was the best we could do This is what I fought for This is not… So why don’t you tell me the truth
10.
Drive Drive Drive 02:32
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Gotta gotta get out alive To know just once what its like to have my own breath And we know its no use to pretend that there’s another way There’s no other way to go about this you know We can drive far away Forget the way back We can start over We could drive far away Forget the way back We can start over We stood on top for awhile with your bad ideas You know that this is serious And I’m not alone It’s no use to pretend that there’s another way to go about this You know We can drive far away Forget the way back We can start over We could drive far away Forget the way back We can start over All that’s good is in the ground Reach for the surface All that’s good is in the ground buried below us We can drive far away We can forget the way back We can start over We could drive far away We could forget the way back We can start over
11.
Clear and Conscious 03:47
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We’re still running The waters coming To take us back Take us back Will we sink when we start to swim against? No, No We’ll be clean again We slip and falter We slip away We’re made of nothing We slip and fall We’ve made nothing of ourselves We’re made of nothing We slip away We made nothing of ourselves Make me new again So I can be clear and conscious of what I’m doing wrong I want to be whole I want to know more than I should Keep talking You’ll say something that you can’t take back Can’t take back Will we stop when we get out of hand? No, no we’ll keep moving Make me new again So I can be clear and conscious of what I’m doing wrong I want to be whole I want to know more than I should Just once let them try to make devils of us And we’ll let it go Make me new again So I can be clear and conscious of what I’m doing wrong I want to be whole I want to know more than I should

credits

released April 13, 2004

Hold On was recorded in January of 2004.

Beau “yyyeeewww” Burchell produced, mixed, and engineered this record at The Dojo in Newport Beach, CA. Pre-production and vocal pre-production was done by Rory Phillips. Hold On was mastered by Sean Sullivan for World Class Audio.

RJ Shaughnessy took photographs and mutilated them every way possible. Britain Miller appears in these photographs. Sergie Loobkoff slapped this all together. Amy Fleisher was the Creative Director.

This album is dedicated to Richard Means.

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